Friday, September 26, 2008

Making it through two.

Today has been really hard. I am slowly coming to the realization that while I love my two-year-old daughter so much, I just really do not like the two-years-old part. You know, it is really interesting though. I look around at other children the same age as Molly and yes, I see their blossoming independence and occasional meltdowns but it is different. Our 8 meltdowns in a day are equivalent to another child's 2. What am I missing here? I know the act of comparison will only bring trouble. I also have it ingrained in me that children develop at their unique rates...and with their unique personalities. But GHESSH... sometimes it just gets a little too tough.

Today in an hour, my child managed to pull every piece of clothing out of her drawers because she refused to pick an outfit from the choices that I had given her. She took EVERY single toy out of Gabriel's room and put it under her bed... a bed that is very low to the ground and difficult for Mommy to get under. There was the tantrum because she couldn't fit her foot into Gabe's shoe and then the meltdown because she could not tee tee on the potty standing up. There was a meltdown dropping Gabe's bouncer off at GOODWILL because as Molly so kindly yelled out the window at the Goodwill employee as we were driving away... "MOLLY'S BOUNCER...MY BABY SEAT". There were tears getting in to the car on our way to the park and getting out of the car at the park... all because I had attempted to help her. What was I thinking? Oh and then there was the park. My sweet child that used to play so well with others at the park. Not only did she try to climb in the red car that another child was playing in, she literally pushed them out of it, looked back at them and yelled "THANK YOU HONEY". For as embarrassed and apologetic as I was to that other unhappy mommy...I have to give Molly a little least she said thank you.

And yes, we set limits and we discipline and we reward positive behaviors. We try to be so consistent and predictable. So what is going on? Is this the terrible twos that I have heard about? Does the transformation happen that QUICKLY? If so, where are the other terrible twos? Can we all get to together, pop some popcorn and watch the naughtiness ensue?

I guess just all of my close Mommy friends are going to have terrible threes? I am so hopeful that this stage is like a right of passage and once you make it don't start back over again at three.

I am really sad that the spicy parts of TWO sometimes over shadow all the things that I love about Molly's age right now. She is so curious and constantly exploring her world. I love that she asks me about things all the time and then tries to use a phrase or a new word learned in her daily interaction. I love the dramatic play and the sweet story times. I love how she twirls my hair. If only I could just crop out the Molly monster that takes over my little girl when she is frustrated, tired, bored, etc. Too bad there isn't a photo shop for your own daily life.

Please send good thoughts this way... I need it!


jwm said...

OH JULIE! I wish I could have read the last part of this entry (the playlist was covering it)... You ARE a GREAT mommy, and this WAS a BAD day for you!! Would it help you if I said there are so many moments throughout my week where I have the thought, "Gosh, I wish I could be a mom more like Julie :)." When I read your blog, I see that you all have a TON of fun and love in your house! We have a lot of love, but I'm not so sure about the "fun" part :P. And you know, for all the "terrible-ness" you may be experiencing with Molly right now, she is the kind of person who makes the world go 'round and will bring so many smiles and joy to people as she often does even now. HANG IN THERE! Keep doing what you're doing, and slowly but surely (I really do believe this will happen), you will have shaped all this energy and independence into something that will bless so many other people. It looks like it will be hard work, but I can see that God have her just the right parents to help her grow up into the person she needs to be. Hope that helps :)

Anonymous said...

Yay terrible twos. I am getting major initiation into step-mommyhood, so I can commiserate with the frustration part and the the guilt with struggling with being frustrated by such a precious little one. My little soon-to-be stepson is such a joy (except for the other night when he puked in his bed 3 times)and I'm usually just focused on not screwing anything (or him) up.

This morning, (before my coffee kicked in) Matthew had a meltdown because he was having a hard time scooping his cereal. He suddenly burst into tears and moaned, "I want eat it!" I felt bad for him, and then REALLY bad because I wanted to giggle. Seems like little things like this happen a few times a day (if he wants daddy, the remote control, tv, his lunchbox aka "pack-pack", or doesn't want food, bath, night-night), ...then the sun will come out and he'll bat his eyes and say "I funny!" Sort of like bipolar...